Saturday, May 13, 2006
MEG Concept Art
The novel MEG is a lot like how Michael Crichton would've written Jaws. A Megalodon, a lot like a shark only extinct now, is discovered by the scientest who was a laughing stock cause he suggested they may still exsist. Said monster proceeds to eat people, boats, whatever. It was an entertaining and quick read, and could be an entertaining monster movie if handled well. So far, so good. The concept art released thus far looks awesome. I'm hoping it will end up a cool summer movie reminding us of the good old days when Jaws ruled the water. However, cause Rush Hour 3 is costing so much to film, MEG is probably being pushed back 'til 2008.
Miami Vice Trailer
I'm getting a little bit excited about this movie. Miami Vice takes the cops from the old TV show and places them deep undercover in modern day, well, Miami. Looks like a pretty awesome flic from where I'm standing. The new trailer at Apple is linked to above, or check it out here.
Friday, May 12, 2006
It's About Time...
...that I posted on here again. Classes are over and I've gotten over my Blogger overload from Monday and Tuesday. So, here and I'm posting again.
...that they approved an Indy 4 script. Lucas says the script is complete, and it's "completely different...It's still got a lot of action, and it's still very funny. I think it works like crazy." Hmm, the 'works like crazy' part is a little odd, but I'm psyched. You know what that means. That's right, it's time to find the Indy DVDs discounted somewhere and own them myself.
...that they approved an Indy 4 script. Lucas says the script is complete, and it's "completely different...It's still got a lot of action, and it's still very funny. I think it works like crazy." Hmm, the 'works like crazy' part is a little odd, but I'm psyched. You know what that means. That's right, it's time to find the Indy DVDs discounted somewhere and own them myself.
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Sorry for the Lack of Updates...
...but I've had my plate full recently. This weekend was studying for tests. Blah. Yesterday and today I've been really really busy with my Tech Blog . It's E3 time, which means lots of big game news, and a surprising rush of other stuff too.
If you're interested in gaming, it's worth the stop over there. If you're just looking for movies, I'll be posting more on here shortly.
If you're interested in gaming, it's worth the stop over there. If you're just looking for movies, I'll be posting more on here shortly.
Tweek Recommends for the Week of May 8-14
Here's the rundown: I take a gander at the upcoming releases for the week, and select one wide and one limited release film. I'll give you a short synopysis of the film and its cast, and why I think it's a winner. Even if the list of options really blows, I'll give you at least one for those of you who just HAVE to see something THIS weekend. Don't worry, if I think even my top choice is going to suck, I'll tell you.
Wide-Release Film
Poseidon- Josh Lucas, Kurt Russel, Richard Dreyfus. A big boat is hit by a wave and flips over. The captain orders all to stay in this one big upside room and wait for help. But a small group of survivors ignores him and makes their way up to the top of the ship as it fills with water. Each has their own motivations for this insubordination, and the characters are all very deep and diverse, leading to many clashes as they learn to overcome their differences and find true strength within (yadda, yadda, yadda). Seems to be ok, other then the fundimental problem of the giant wave. Tsunamis don't make waves until they're near shore, that's what makes the wave seem big. On the ocean, you'd probably neve even notice it. Enjoyable if you can get over the impossibility of the basic premise.
Limited-Release Film
Dead Man's Shoes- Yahoo! Movies:
Looks like an exciting revenge flic. Could be worth it, particularly for supporting the lower-budget crowd.
Enjoy your week at the movies.
Wide-Release Film
Poseidon- Josh Lucas, Kurt Russel, Richard Dreyfus. A big boat is hit by a wave and flips over. The captain orders all to stay in this one big upside room and wait for help. But a small group of survivors ignores him and makes their way up to the top of the ship as it fills with water. Each has their own motivations for this insubordination, and the characters are all very deep and diverse, leading to many clashes as they learn to overcome their differences and find true strength within (yadda, yadda, yadda). Seems to be ok, other then the fundimental problem of the giant wave. Tsunamis don't make waves until they're near shore, that's what makes the wave seem big. On the ocean, you'd probably neve even notice it. Enjoyable if you can get over the impossibility of the basic premise.
Limited-Release Film
Dead Man's Shoes- Yahoo! Movies:
Richard and younger brother Anthony return to the drugs and gang-ridden hometown they left eight years before. They set up camp in the hills overlooking the town, reminiscing over their shared past. But, they're not here to reminisce. Richard is here for revenge.
Looks like an exciting revenge flic. Could be worth it, particularly for supporting the lower-budget crowd.
Enjoy your week at the movies.
Weekend Box Office: Praising My Followers
Way to go! Mission: Impossible III made it to number one this week, despite a surprisingly week opening of $48 million(M:i-2 made $60 million and had horrible reviews while M:i made only $45 million). Way down in second place was R.V., a recent #1, making only $11.1 million. An American Haunting rounded out the top three, earning a paltry $6.4 million in its opening week.
Good job, keep up the good work. Together, we can make movies excellent again.
Good job, keep up the good work. Together, we can make movies excellent again.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
REVIEW: Mission: Impossible III
J.J Abrams, you have mastered the art of suspense.
From the opening scene, Mission: Impossible III sets the adrenaline going and doesn't quit. The acting in this film are superb (Simon Pegg, I love you even more then I did after Shaun of the Dead), the plot is comprehensible while not overly simple, and the action never stops.
For two hours and ten minutes, since the first scene, my girlfriend sat there squirming and jumping and freaking out. About halfway through, after asking her repeatidly why she was reacting so intensly to the movie, I managed to get "It's scary." After the movie, I asked her to elaborate. "It's not scary in the frighting way, but scary in the way that your heart is constantly beating four times faster then it should."
That's the perfect description. The tension in the movie is immediately there, and it doesn't let up until the credits roll.
Which brings me to my first complaint about the movie. It was almost too much. At some points you feel like you really needed a break, just for a minute or two. Simply watching the movie is a real emotional drain.
My second biggest complaint involves the excellent acting. Philip Seymour Hoffman, either stop acting so damn well or ask for a bigger part. As the bad guy, I absolutly hated this man with a passion cause I belived every threat he was making. He was one scary dude; it was perfect. But there wasn't enough. He was so amazing in that role that I really wish he'd gotten about double the screen time.
My final complaint is...the plot. Like I said above, it is easily understandable while not being overly simple. But, particularly after having rewatched M:i and M:i-2 in the last couple days, some of the plot twists do seem a bit repetitive and predictable (hmm, what element does every M:i movie use to "surprise" the audience). And the plot itself didn't seem to set up its twists very well. They happened, but I didn't have the shock effect that should have been there. It was more like "oh, lookie there." Of course they may be related to the non-stop adrenline rush. The high level of tension throughout the movie makes it difficult to set up those moments effectively.
Now comes the inevitable: which of the movies in the trilogy is best.
M:i:III easily beats its immediately predecessor, M:i-2. The second installment left me thinking "you've got to be kidding me." They reused the mask trick about a million and a half times and that got quite tiring. The motorcycle chase scene managed to run beyond cool and into the realm of the absurd (particularly the part where they both jump off and collide in mid air, someone should've seen and stopped that scene from being made). Ultimately I thought part 2 was enjoyable, but only a great movie if you could step out of thinking mode for a couple hours, which shouldn't be necessary.
Comparing part 1 and 2 is, I belive, ultimately impossible. They are two very different movies. The original involved no elaborate gun fights and little in the way of fight sequences. The action that was there was well done and classic, but it was a very plot-driven movie. And that plot was superb. Watching it as a little kid it took me a lot of viewings to finally figure it all out, but that is one movie that twists and turns every second and a half. The best part of it is that in the end, almost no one is aware that any of the events of the movie actually occurred. It's a spy movie in which the characters are all shadows and do their job without anyone's knowledge. Both of the other installments move away from this genre and become action movies. What I like about M:i:III is that it combines the two to create an action movie that stays truer to its namesake then part two did. There's the "super secret spy" concept along with the "go in guns blazing" sequences.
This is a beautiful piece of cinema for every action/spy fan. If you like action in ranges from James Bond to Rambo, this is a movie you can't afford to miss. While the plot can be a bit repetiive and the action almost too non-stop, it's the perfect summer blockbuster, and one hell of a way to kick off the season.
BOTTOM LINE- 8.5/10
From the opening scene, Mission: Impossible III sets the adrenaline going and doesn't quit. The acting in this film are superb (Simon Pegg, I love you even more then I did after Shaun of the Dead), the plot is comprehensible while not overly simple, and the action never stops.
For two hours and ten minutes, since the first scene, my girlfriend sat there squirming and jumping and freaking out. About halfway through, after asking her repeatidly why she was reacting so intensly to the movie, I managed to get "It's scary." After the movie, I asked her to elaborate. "It's not scary in the frighting way, but scary in the way that your heart is constantly beating four times faster then it should."
That's the perfect description. The tension in the movie is immediately there, and it doesn't let up until the credits roll.
Which brings me to my first complaint about the movie. It was almost too much. At some points you feel like you really needed a break, just for a minute or two. Simply watching the movie is a real emotional drain.
My second biggest complaint involves the excellent acting. Philip Seymour Hoffman, either stop acting so damn well or ask for a bigger part. As the bad guy, I absolutly hated this man with a passion cause I belived every threat he was making. He was one scary dude; it was perfect. But there wasn't enough. He was so amazing in that role that I really wish he'd gotten about double the screen time.
My final complaint is...the plot. Like I said above, it is easily understandable while not being overly simple. But, particularly after having rewatched M:i and M:i-2 in the last couple days, some of the plot twists do seem a bit repetitive and predictable (hmm, what element does every M:i movie use to "surprise" the audience). And the plot itself didn't seem to set up its twists very well. They happened, but I didn't have the shock effect that should have been there. It was more like "oh, lookie there." Of course they may be related to the non-stop adrenline rush. The high level of tension throughout the movie makes it difficult to set up those moments effectively.
Now comes the inevitable: which of the movies in the trilogy is best.
M:i:III easily beats its immediately predecessor, M:i-2. The second installment left me thinking "you've got to be kidding me." They reused the mask trick about a million and a half times and that got quite tiring. The motorcycle chase scene managed to run beyond cool and into the realm of the absurd (particularly the part where they both jump off and collide in mid air, someone should've seen and stopped that scene from being made). Ultimately I thought part 2 was enjoyable, but only a great movie if you could step out of thinking mode for a couple hours, which shouldn't be necessary.
Comparing part 1 and 2 is, I belive, ultimately impossible. They are two very different movies. The original involved no elaborate gun fights and little in the way of fight sequences. The action that was there was well done and classic, but it was a very plot-driven movie. And that plot was superb. Watching it as a little kid it took me a lot of viewings to finally figure it all out, but that is one movie that twists and turns every second and a half. The best part of it is that in the end, almost no one is aware that any of the events of the movie actually occurred. It's a spy movie in which the characters are all shadows and do their job without anyone's knowledge. Both of the other installments move away from this genre and become action movies. What I like about M:i:III is that it combines the two to create an action movie that stays truer to its namesake then part two did. There's the "super secret spy" concept along with the "go in guns blazing" sequences.
This is a beautiful piece of cinema for every action/spy fan. If you like action in ranges from James Bond to Rambo, this is a movie you can't afford to miss. While the plot can be a bit repetiive and the action almost too non-stop, it's the perfect summer blockbuster, and one hell of a way to kick off the season.
BOTTOM LINE- 8.5/10
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Old School Star Wars!!
Having been raised by my parents, I've grown up with an appreciation for originals and classics, and untainted, unaltered art. That's why I got pretty pissed off when I saw Haden Christensen sitting there in ghost form smiling at Mark Hamill instead of David Prowse at the end of the recent DVD release of Return of the Jedi. It definately wasn't the same Star Wars I first saw when I was a kid, taped off of television and fast-forwarding through commercials. It wasn't the same Star Wars we finally bought on box set one year for Christmas. All the stuff added in made it something different. You don't change a classic just cause you have the technology. You DON'T change a classic. It's just....wrong.
Well, I can be happy now. starwars.com just announced that it plans to make the original, untainted Star Wars Trilogy available on DVD beween September '06 and New Years Eve. You will only be able to get each movie individually, not as a set. And the DVDs will actually also have the 2004 "remastered" version, with "as bonus material, the theatrical edition of the film."
Anyway, good news for me, my family and, according to the report, "a truely countless number of fans."
Well, I can be happy now. starwars.com just announced that it plans to make the original, untainted Star Wars Trilogy available on DVD beween September '06 and New Years Eve. You will only be able to get each movie individually, not as a set. And the DVDs will actually also have the 2004 "remastered" version, with "as bonus material, the theatrical edition of the film."
Anyway, good news for me, my family and, according to the report, "a truely countless number of fans."
Batman Begins 2: Goyer and Nolan Speak...
...kinda. Ok, I'll be honest. They really didn't have much to say other then that "they have come up with a great story for the sequel." Said comments were made at the Saturn Awards, where Batman Begins won Best Fantasy Movie, Best Actor (Christian Bale) and Best Writing (Christopher Nolan and David S. Goyer). You can check out the brief video and article at IESB.net.
Movie Studios, Why Must You Make Me Spite You So
So, I'm in love with my MacBook Pro. Even more so with Boot Camp, because now I have a small partition for gaming and other such Windows-only activities. One of these activites that excited me recently was the realization that I can finally look at DVD-ROM content available only to Window's users (my previous PC didn't have a DVD-ROM drive). So, after today's purchase of Mission Impossible and Mission Impossible 2 I decided to try and get into some of the DVD-ROM content on the later.
So, I pop in my shiney new M:i:II disc, and guessy what I get. A program installation notice to the effect of "In order to get the goodies, you have to install the program we want you to install." It's a very nice sounding program called PCFriendly. I do a quick Google search and get about a thousand hits title "PCFriendly Enables DVD Backchannels." For those of you who don't know what this means (as I was previously unaware), it boils down the the program opening up back doors into your computer so it can send out all of your personal information and computer use habits without being caught by spyware, firewalls, and most other security devices.
I filled out some bogus information and was going to try and go ahead and look at the content and see what the program might have had to offer, but there was some error and the DVD wouldn't play. So, looks like Ethan Hunt is going to have to be viewed sans DVD-ROM features for the rest of eternity.
But, I have quite a DVD collection if I do say so myself, and so I grabbed another I knew had "interactive content." American Pie got to be attempt #2. Yet again I have to install their software. But it's something different: InterActual Player. Hmm, that sounds familiar. Oh wait, I remember why. It's because the liscense agreement for PCFriendly said it was related to InterActual Player. So now the movie studios are trying to two seperate programs, both of which have the save DVD-playing cover, to moniter my activity and sell it to the highest bidder. InterActual Player tried to get tricky on me too. It makes you enter in your ZIP code and age range. There's a couple other tabs with various information. One has their Privacy Statements and checkboxes next to statements declaring the computer user's agreement to share their personal information (both of them set to be checked by default and hidden where most users won't even notice their exsistence). I of course uncheck this and proceed to browse to the other tabs, seeing what else there is (not much of note). I stumble back onto the tab with the checkboxes. Lo and behold, they've magically decided they want to be checked again. That has to be illegal in some way or another.
In the end InterActual Player really didn't offer anything of value. I'll stick to watching DVDs on my OS X parition. The quality is SOOOOOO much better then anything I've seen on the various PC options (VLC, Windows Media Player, other various and often spyware related other players).
Hollywood, I love movies. So why must you make me spite you so. I really do want to get along. You gain very little by forcing people to jump through these hoops. I understand and can even completely support content available only on a computer, and even content that requires some common and non-spyware related plug-ins or programs. But what you're doing is just shameful.
So, what you should start doing is integrating content that will play on any standard DVD playing software. If I can hit button on the menu that says "Play Movie" on the computer and then proceed to watch the movie, I should be able to hit the button that said "DVD-ROM Content" on the same computer using the same program and proceed to watch the DVD-Rom content. I would even support the studios rallying behind or creating a new DVD playing program (but just one, none of this crap having multiple programs that are really all the same thing and even related to each other) that supports this extra content and doesn't invade user privacy. A DVD playback program should do just that. All you're giving me is spyware that happens to also play DVDs.
So, I pop in my shiney new M:i:II disc, and guessy what I get. A program installation notice to the effect of "In order to get the goodies, you have to install the program we want you to install." It's a very nice sounding program called PCFriendly. I do a quick Google search and get about a thousand hits title "PCFriendly Enables DVD Backchannels." For those of you who don't know what this means (as I was previously unaware), it boils down the the program opening up back doors into your computer so it can send out all of your personal information and computer use habits without being caught by spyware, firewalls, and most other security devices.
I filled out some bogus information and was going to try and go ahead and look at the content and see what the program might have had to offer, but there was some error and the DVD wouldn't play. So, looks like Ethan Hunt is going to have to be viewed sans DVD-ROM features for the rest of eternity.
But, I have quite a DVD collection if I do say so myself, and so I grabbed another I knew had "interactive content." American Pie got to be attempt #2. Yet again I have to install their software. But it's something different: InterActual Player. Hmm, that sounds familiar. Oh wait, I remember why. It's because the liscense agreement for PCFriendly said it was related to InterActual Player. So now the movie studios are trying to two seperate programs, both of which have the save DVD-playing cover, to moniter my activity and sell it to the highest bidder. InterActual Player tried to get tricky on me too. It makes you enter in your ZIP code and age range. There's a couple other tabs with various information. One has their Privacy Statements and checkboxes next to statements declaring the computer user's agreement to share their personal information (both of them set to be checked by default and hidden where most users won't even notice their exsistence). I of course uncheck this and proceed to browse to the other tabs, seeing what else there is (not much of note). I stumble back onto the tab with the checkboxes. Lo and behold, they've magically decided they want to be checked again. That has to be illegal in some way or another.
In the end InterActual Player really didn't offer anything of value. I'll stick to watching DVDs on my OS X parition. The quality is SOOOOOO much better then anything I've seen on the various PC options (VLC, Windows Media Player, other various and often spyware related other players).
Hollywood, I love movies. So why must you make me spite you so. I really do want to get along. You gain very little by forcing people to jump through these hoops. I understand and can even completely support content available only on a computer, and even content that requires some common and non-spyware related plug-ins or programs. But what you're doing is just shameful.
So, what you should start doing is integrating content that will play on any standard DVD playing software. If I can hit button on the menu that says "Play Movie" on the computer and then proceed to watch the movie, I should be able to hit the button that said "DVD-ROM Content" on the same computer using the same program and proceed to watch the DVD-Rom content. I would even support the studios rallying behind or creating a new DVD playing program (but just one, none of this crap having multiple programs that are really all the same thing and even related to each other) that supports this extra content and doesn't invade user privacy. A DVD playback program should do just that. All you're giving me is spyware that happens to also play DVDs.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
REVIEW: Doom
EDIT: This is rather long, so I'll sum up for those how don't want to read. Terrible flic. it doesn't know what kind of film is and doesn't do anyting it tries to do well at all. Don't waste any time or money on this movie.
This is not a Doom movie. This is a movie that strives to be a monster movie, a zombie movie and a regular ole action flic that slaps on a video game title to sell tickets. Unfortunately, it fails in nearly all of these respects, and the end result is a string of nonsense and poorly connected plot points.
The film does sport plenty of action, but even that manages to be rather bland and rediculous. Some of the set ups are too obvious and distract from what little credibility this movie might have ("'It's a holding cell.' 'How do you know?' 'The walls are electrified.'" Hmmm, electrified walls, I wonder where this is going eventually).
It begins as a horror/monster flic without any monsters. It opens with the monsters not being seen but killing people (per usual), wastes no time in getting our marines in there where the monsters are, but still doesn't allow us to actually see any monsters until about 45 minutes into the film. This 45 minutes is very poorly spent, too. Unlike most moster flics that wait to reveal what's in the shadows, they completely skip any sort of suspensful build up and only provide minimal character development. Instead what is presented is a bunch of scenes showcasing that we have a group of really trigger happy soldiers who want to try to look relaly cool in their uniforms with their guns. They fire and/or jump at about 20 different things that are not monsters and should not be fired and/or jumped at, making this standard gag enormously overused and leaving the audience begging for our heros to actually A. see an actual monster or B. learn to actually hit something with those guns. Their aim is terrible for being highly trained military men. When you see a doorway with a thing inside it, you should see bullets hit something besides the doorframe. I mean, I could do that. Oh, but wait, that would mean no flashy sparks all over the place. My bad.
So you finally see a monster, and the movie abruptly stops being much of a monster movie. You still have a few instances where you get the "OMG, what's in the shadows!!!!" crap, but mostly you see a continued series of "we see something. It's big and fast and running away and we really can't shoot very well, so lets run after it until we all magically meet up again somehow having lost the monster, only for it to come back in about 30 seconds and we kill it then. But we can't kill it until after it's picked off at least one of our men."
So, after this tiring procedure, the movie alters yet again into a zombie flic when we learn that somehow, our dead friends are becoming these creatures. Don't ask how, 'cause it's a painfully horrible plot point that's a really tough pill to swallow. And that's after swallowing the horse pills that are the rest of the plot holes in the movie.
Oh, it gets worse. Read on only if you plan on never seeing the movie, which is my recommendation. For those of you who wish to skip the spoilers, I'll put an "end spoilers" mark below.
**SPOILERS**
So, we learn that on ancient Mars (where the movie is set), there was a civilization that had these superhumanish kinda people because they had an extra set of chromosomes, and this lab is set up to figure out how that worked. They managed to extract these chormosomes and inject them into somebody. This person didn't turn into a superhuman, but a monster (one of the very monsters plaguing our troops).
Our lady protoganist, a scientist for this company doing the research on Mars, figures out that somehow this extra set of chromosomes can tell if a person is fundamentally good or evil, and it suggests that it does so by reading the 10% of the human genome that apparently haven't been figured out (the "blueprint to the soul" they call it).
Suddenly, Sarge (The Rock) is saying every civilian should die. There's a tense moment when he shoots one of his own squad for insabordination and a slight stand-off ensues. This failed to be comprehensible, because this isn't at all how Sarge was portrayed before this point in the movie. It is a character they could have developed, but instead he seems like a decent military guy until this completely unforseen twist. If they wanted to do this with the character, they needed to ease into the sudden extreme actions he takes. Unfortunately, this had the potential to be the most intreguing part of the movie despite its poor development, but the stand off is interrupted and the script writers are saved from having to write a good resolution for this conflict by an intruding monster.
Well, when a bunch of infected civilians attack, Sarge is dragged into their mass, our lady protagonist's brother who happens to be on Sarge's squad is hit by a ricotched bullet from his own gun (I told you they sucked at shooting) and is bleeding to death. So sister/scientist injects him with the missing chormosome knowing that despite all the people he's killed with the marines he isn't a killer at heart and will be fine. Not sure what exactly genre this part of the movie fits into, but it certainly doesn't fit into any of the above or below, so it counts as it's own.
Of course he becomes a superhuman. Sarge however, as revealed in that confusing and abrupt stand-off shortly before, is evil and is becoming a monster. The two fight and the movie ends as a pretty run of the mill action movies. Sarge hasn't actually turned into a monster yet, you just are supposed to know it's coming. So it's actually still just two humans fighing each other: first with guns, then with the standard "Wait, let's settle this the old fashioned way" hand-to-hand combat that any action movie with a clear good guy and bad guy ends. The main problem with this is that Sarge wasn't a bad guy less then 30 minutes ago, and this other dude seemed like just a slightly more developed side character.
**END SPOILERS**
This movie tries to open like a monster movie, build like a zombie movie, rise to full climax like some kind of hero story, and resolve itself like a standard action/kung fu flic. It fails miserably at all points. Instead of picking a direction and going with it, the powers that be instead tried to peice different genres together. C'mon you guys, you could've at least tried a blender to get all four going together at the same time. The plot is terrible and has more flaws then I've ever seen in a movie. The plot twists aren't the sudden suprises that make a movie great, but the confusing transitions from one genre to the next that are all ultimately cheezey and wholey unbelieveable (and that's coming for a fan of The Matrix).
My final beef with the flic: the title. As far as I could tell, this movie had absolutly nothing to do with the Doom video game series. It had the BFG, a brief use of the chainsaw (again, rather confusing and poorly thrown in there), the character Sarge, and it took place on Mars. I think that's about it. Oh yeah, and the brief section (poorly thown in and poorly created) that takes place like an FPS video game; it was a sequence that may have sounded good on the drawing board, but the filmmakers really should have seen how crappy it was and left it out. Although I guess if they did that for the rest of the movie, there wouldn't be a movie.
BOTTOM LINE: 2/10
This is not a Doom movie. This is a movie that strives to be a monster movie, a zombie movie and a regular ole action flic that slaps on a video game title to sell tickets. Unfortunately, it fails in nearly all of these respects, and the end result is a string of nonsense and poorly connected plot points.
The film does sport plenty of action, but even that manages to be rather bland and rediculous. Some of the set ups are too obvious and distract from what little credibility this movie might have ("'It's a holding cell.' 'How do you know?' 'The walls are electrified.'" Hmmm, electrified walls, I wonder where this is going eventually).
It begins as a horror/monster flic without any monsters. It opens with the monsters not being seen but killing people (per usual), wastes no time in getting our marines in there where the monsters are, but still doesn't allow us to actually see any monsters until about 45 minutes into the film. This 45 minutes is very poorly spent, too. Unlike most moster flics that wait to reveal what's in the shadows, they completely skip any sort of suspensful build up and only provide minimal character development. Instead what is presented is a bunch of scenes showcasing that we have a group of really trigger happy soldiers who want to try to look relaly cool in their uniforms with their guns. They fire and/or jump at about 20 different things that are not monsters and should not be fired and/or jumped at, making this standard gag enormously overused and leaving the audience begging for our heros to actually A. see an actual monster or B. learn to actually hit something with those guns. Their aim is terrible for being highly trained military men. When you see a doorway with a thing inside it, you should see bullets hit something besides the doorframe. I mean, I could do that. Oh, but wait, that would mean no flashy sparks all over the place. My bad.
So you finally see a monster, and the movie abruptly stops being much of a monster movie. You still have a few instances where you get the "OMG, what's in the shadows!!!!" crap, but mostly you see a continued series of "we see something. It's big and fast and running away and we really can't shoot very well, so lets run after it until we all magically meet up again somehow having lost the monster, only for it to come back in about 30 seconds and we kill it then. But we can't kill it until after it's picked off at least one of our men."
So, after this tiring procedure, the movie alters yet again into a zombie flic when we learn that somehow, our dead friends are becoming these creatures. Don't ask how, 'cause it's a painfully horrible plot point that's a really tough pill to swallow. And that's after swallowing the horse pills that are the rest of the plot holes in the movie.
Oh, it gets worse. Read on only if you plan on never seeing the movie, which is my recommendation. For those of you who wish to skip the spoilers, I'll put an "end spoilers" mark below.
**SPOILERS**
So, we learn that on ancient Mars (where the movie is set), there was a civilization that had these superhumanish kinda people because they had an extra set of chromosomes, and this lab is set up to figure out how that worked. They managed to extract these chormosomes and inject them into somebody. This person didn't turn into a superhuman, but a monster (one of the very monsters plaguing our troops).
Our lady protoganist, a scientist for this company doing the research on Mars, figures out that somehow this extra set of chromosomes can tell if a person is fundamentally good or evil, and it suggests that it does so by reading the 10% of the human genome that apparently haven't been figured out (the "blueprint to the soul" they call it).
Suddenly, Sarge (The Rock) is saying every civilian should die. There's a tense moment when he shoots one of his own squad for insabordination and a slight stand-off ensues. This failed to be comprehensible, because this isn't at all how Sarge was portrayed before this point in the movie. It is a character they could have developed, but instead he seems like a decent military guy until this completely unforseen twist. If they wanted to do this with the character, they needed to ease into the sudden extreme actions he takes. Unfortunately, this had the potential to be the most intreguing part of the movie despite its poor development, but the stand off is interrupted and the script writers are saved from having to write a good resolution for this conflict by an intruding monster.
Well, when a bunch of infected civilians attack, Sarge is dragged into their mass, our lady protagonist's brother who happens to be on Sarge's squad is hit by a ricotched bullet from his own gun (I told you they sucked at shooting) and is bleeding to death. So sister/scientist injects him with the missing chormosome knowing that despite all the people he's killed with the marines he isn't a killer at heart and will be fine. Not sure what exactly genre this part of the movie fits into, but it certainly doesn't fit into any of the above or below, so it counts as it's own.
Of course he becomes a superhuman. Sarge however, as revealed in that confusing and abrupt stand-off shortly before, is evil and is becoming a monster. The two fight and the movie ends as a pretty run of the mill action movies. Sarge hasn't actually turned into a monster yet, you just are supposed to know it's coming. So it's actually still just two humans fighing each other: first with guns, then with the standard "Wait, let's settle this the old fashioned way" hand-to-hand combat that any action movie with a clear good guy and bad guy ends. The main problem with this is that Sarge wasn't a bad guy less then 30 minutes ago, and this other dude seemed like just a slightly more developed side character.
**END SPOILERS**
This movie tries to open like a monster movie, build like a zombie movie, rise to full climax like some kind of hero story, and resolve itself like a standard action/kung fu flic. It fails miserably at all points. Instead of picking a direction and going with it, the powers that be instead tried to peice different genres together. C'mon you guys, you could've at least tried a blender to get all four going together at the same time. The plot is terrible and has more flaws then I've ever seen in a movie. The plot twists aren't the sudden suprises that make a movie great, but the confusing transitions from one genre to the next that are all ultimately cheezey and wholey unbelieveable (and that's coming for a fan of The Matrix).
My final beef with the flic: the title. As far as I could tell, this movie had absolutly nothing to do with the Doom video game series. It had the BFG, a brief use of the chainsaw (again, rather confusing and poorly thrown in there), the character Sarge, and it took place on Mars. I think that's about it. Oh yeah, and the brief section (poorly thown in and poorly created) that takes place like an FPS video game; it was a sequence that may have sounded good on the drawing board, but the filmmakers really should have seen how crappy it was and left it out. Although I guess if they did that for the rest of the movie, there wouldn't be a movie.
BOTTOM LINE: 2/10
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Aflick is the New Kirk
Wow, busy day for movie news. JJ Abrams is producing Star Trek XI, but may or may not be directing, and is apparently set to talk with Ben Aflick to star in the film as either Kirk or "some other nameless protagonist." Not sure what to say about this. Could be good, could be bad. Just have to wait and see.
Wolfgang Talks: Ender and Bat vs Supes
Director Wolfgang Peterson (Enemy Mine, Air Force One, Troy) has announced in an interview that the next film he plans to tackle is conversion for the ultra-popular sci-fi book Ender's Game. "We're getting the script in a few weeks, and if everything goes fine and that script goes in the right direction, it could indeed be my next one." As for Orson Scott Card's infamous boy genious, over 1000 kids will be auditioned for the role.
After the complete failure that was Batman and Robin, it appeared for a while that the Dark Knight's only hope for getting back onto the silver screen was in a Batman vs. Superman incarnation. However, with the new projects for these two characters individually, that was put on hold. The success of Batman Begins and the level of anticipation for Superman Returns has merely seemed to provide support for both camps on wheter or not their combo flic should be made in the near future. Regarded as one of the best sources for Batman movie news on the web, Batman on Film has aruged that the success of the two movies thus far has invigorated the characters and brought new life to their individual franchises. However, countingdown.com has reported that both Charles Roven and Christian Bale, Begins producer and star respectively, have claimed that, while on the back-burner over at WB, the movie is still likely to occur.
And if it does, Peterson is likely to direct. "I love the concept very much. It might happen, but it might also happen when I'm 85. Who knows, because they first have to get their Superman [Returns, which opens June 30,] going". He also said that, even if he's 85 when it finally happens, he'd love to do it.
Personally, I think it could work, but they'd have to tread carefully. In my opinion, Batman kicks so much more ass then Superman, but that's mainly because every battle has been practically handed to Superman cause of his powers. According to the Batman vs. Superman comic series, Batman has a kryptonite ring tucked away in his cave, just in case. Anway, ponder. I know at least one person that is going to be very excited about the Ender's news.
After the complete failure that was Batman and Robin, it appeared for a while that the Dark Knight's only hope for getting back onto the silver screen was in a Batman vs. Superman incarnation. However, with the new projects for these two characters individually, that was put on hold. The success of Batman Begins and the level of anticipation for Superman Returns has merely seemed to provide support for both camps on wheter or not their combo flic should be made in the near future. Regarded as one of the best sources for Batman movie news on the web, Batman on Film has aruged that the success of the two movies thus far has invigorated the characters and brought new life to their individual franchises. However, countingdown.com has reported that both Charles Roven and Christian Bale, Begins producer and star respectively, have claimed that, while on the back-burner over at WB, the movie is still likely to occur.
And if it does, Peterson is likely to direct. "I love the concept very much. It might happen, but it might also happen when I'm 85. Who knows, because they first have to get their Superman [Returns, which opens June 30,] going". He also said that, even if he's 85 when it finally happens, he'd love to do it.
Personally, I think it could work, but they'd have to tread carefully. In my opinion, Batman kicks so much more ass then Superman, but that's mainly because every battle has been practically handed to Superman cause of his powers. According to the Batman vs. Superman comic series, Batman has a kryptonite ring tucked away in his cave, just in case. Anway, ponder. I know at least one person that is going to be very excited about the Ender's news.
Couple More Big Trailers
Earlier I pointed ya'll to the new Superman Returns trailer. Now I've got two more for you.
I loved Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, but wasn't to excited about the sequel. I think the new trailer for it has changed my mind. Looks pretty sweet. I didn't think the sequel could possibly live up to the original, but it appears Disney may not let us down (for the first time in a long time). EDIT: The previous link seems to have downgraded the quality of its trailer. here is a different mirror.
Also, I earlier pointed you to the French release of trailer for Casino Royale. Here's an offical English release of the trailer. You can actually hear what's going on now. It ALSO looks pretty sweet. Later.
I loved Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, but wasn't to excited about the sequel. I think the new trailer for it has changed my mind. Looks pretty sweet. I didn't think the sequel could possibly live up to the original, but it appears Disney may not let us down (for the first time in a long time). EDIT: The previous link seems to have downgraded the quality of its trailer. here is a different mirror.
Also, I earlier pointed you to the French release of trailer for Casino Royale. Here's an offical English release of the trailer. You can actually hear what's going on now. It ALSO looks pretty sweet. Later.
Supes Trailer Live
Despite my general lack of excitement about this movie, this helped that apathy fade just a little bit. Check out the new trailer for Superman Returns here. It runs right at the standard 2.5 minutes. Enjoy.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Tweek Recommends for the Week of May 1-7
Here's the rundown: I take a gander at the upcoming releases for the week, and select one wide and one limited release film. I'll give you a short synopysis of the film and its cast, and why I think it's a winner. Even if the list of options really blows, I'll give you at least one for those of you who just HAVE to see something THIS weekend. Don't worry, if I think even my top choice is going to suck, I'll tell you.
Wide-Release Film
Mission: Impossible III- Tom Cruise, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ving Rhames. Cruise has quit active spy duty and is instead training new IMF agents. But, of course, he's brought back into the game to take the new baddy, Hoffman. General ass-kicking, physics defying and s$(t blowing-up ensues. Looks to be an awesome action flic.
Limited-Release Film
The Proposition- Guy Pierce, Emily Watson, John Hurt. According to Yahoo! Movies
Wide-Release Film
Mission: Impossible III- Tom Cruise, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ving Rhames. Cruise has quit active spy duty and is instead training new IMF agents. But, of course, he's brought back into the game to take the new baddy, Hoffman. General ass-kicking, physics defying and s$(t blowing-up ensues. Looks to be an awesome action flic.
Limited-Release Film
The Proposition- Guy Pierce, Emily Watson, John Hurt. According to Yahoo! Movies
Cave's 19th-century tale begins with the proposition of the title, as Captain Stanley (Ray Winstone) captures fugitive brothers Charley (Guy Pearce) and Mikey Burns (Richard Wilson) at a scene of bloody rape and murder. Informing Charley that he must kill his older brother, Arthur (Danny Huston), in order to be set free, Stanley drags Mikey to a decrepit jailhouse while he waits for Charley to carry out the deed.Cool, cool. Enjoy your week at the movies.
Weekend Box Office: Praising My Followers
You all listened to me, with R.V. and United 93 coming in first and second respectively, exactally the two I recommended. While the mostly uninspired Robin Williams Comedy R.V> is likely to lose big bucks this week, I hope those of you who havn't seen United 93 will do so eventually. It's completely without politics and bias, at least as much as a movie can be. It is strickly facts with no embellishing or dramatizing. If they could make a documentary of that day consisting of only those few hours, that would be this movie. Anyway, good job my following, keep up the good work.
Casino Royale Trailer
Check out the trailer to Casino Royale over at You Tube. I'm inclined to disagree with Mr. JoBlo this time, and I have to say I'm stoked about this movie. I wanna see some old school Bond again. Anyway, head on over there and watch. Unfortunately you won't be able to understand any spoken word on the trailer cause it's in French. Still, enjoy.
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