Thursday, February 22, 2007
Back...Again
Another "hopefully I'm back this time." Got a few reviews coming up. Maybe a wrap up of the latest news. We'll see what happens. Let the good times roll.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
REVIEW (Kinda): Snakes on a Plane
Hmm, this is a tough review to write. It's probably going to be short. The whole thing could probably be summed up in just one sentence.
Holy fuck, that was amazing.
Think of some random way that a snake could kill someone. Got that image in your mind, nice and vivid. Ok, that is a scene in the movie. Doesn't matter what you were thinking of, it's there. Every classic "jump out at you" trick in the book is there. It's the most rediculous secenario in the world. There are snakes running around killing people on a plane.
It's also the most fun you'll have at the movies in a long time. With every jump, you laugh. The most painful visuals in the world are playing out before you, and it's funny. And Samuel L. Jackson is pure bad-ass. If you thought you were excited cause you heard him say "I'm tired of these mother-fucking snakes on my mother-fucking plane!" then you don't know the half of it. The end of that line, the part you haven't heard, is the best part.
It's fun, it's a great time. Get with your friends and see it. Many times. Start now.
And here comes the part where this is only 'kinda' a review. I'm not gonna rate the movie. If you're analyzing this moving and trying to give it a grade, you've missed the point. It's just pure fun.
BOTTOM LINE: It's fucking sweet
Holy fuck, that was amazing.
Think of some random way that a snake could kill someone. Got that image in your mind, nice and vivid. Ok, that is a scene in the movie. Doesn't matter what you were thinking of, it's there. Every classic "jump out at you" trick in the book is there. It's the most rediculous secenario in the world. There are snakes running around killing people on a plane.
It's also the most fun you'll have at the movies in a long time. With every jump, you laugh. The most painful visuals in the world are playing out before you, and it's funny. And Samuel L. Jackson is pure bad-ass. If you thought you were excited cause you heard him say "I'm tired of these mother-fucking snakes on my mother-fucking plane!" then you don't know the half of it. The end of that line, the part you haven't heard, is the best part.
It's fun, it's a great time. Get with your friends and see it. Many times. Start now.
And here comes the part where this is only 'kinda' a review. I'm not gonna rate the movie. If you're analyzing this moving and trying to give it a grade, you've missed the point. It's just pure fun.
BOTTOM LINE: It's fucking sweet
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Back Again, Hopefully for Good
I'm all moved in at Purdue, with my decent internet hooked up and going. Hopefully that means I'm back at it for good. Most people that ever read this have probably given up on it by now, but I"m back. So, here we go again.
Monday, August 07, 2006
Batman Begins 2 get Knighted
Woohoo, an update. I had a review of Pirates 2 in the works, but then my laptop got stolen along with the draft I had. Thus far I've been too busy/lazy to re-write, but it might make it up here eventually.
And I'm a little slow in writing this news, but it's cool. The much-anticipated (by me at least) sequal to Batman Begins got it's title last week. In my opinion, it's just plain bad ass.
The Dark Knight
SWEET!! Anyway, really looking forward to that. It made me want to watch Begins again, but guess what. My copy of that movie was in my computer when it got stolen. So my $2500 laptop gets stolen, and just to add insult to injury my favorite movie was inside.
Anyway, I'll stop bitching and let you reflect on the awesome new title for our next Batman movie.
2008 can't get here soon enough.
And I'm a little slow in writing this news, but it's cool. The much-anticipated (by me at least) sequal to Batman Begins got it's title last week. In my opinion, it's just plain bad ass.
The Dark Knight
SWEET!! Anyway, really looking forward to that. It made me want to watch Begins again, but guess what. My copy of that movie was in my computer when it got stolen. So my $2500 laptop gets stolen, and just to add insult to injury my favorite movie was inside.
Anyway, I'll stop bitching and let you reflect on the awesome new title for our next Batman movie.
2008 can't get here soon enough.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
REVIEW: Clerks II
This is going to be a fairly brief review. I really don’t have very much to say about it. What I do have to say I’ll keep very brief and to the point.
This may be the funniest movie ever made. Period.
I know, I know. That’s a pretty bold statement. Notice I qualified it with the word “may,” to avoid at least a little bit of the certain backlash I’m sure to receive (or would if anybody actually read this thing). And I know there’s some stiff competition, Kevin Smith’s own Dogma qualifies as such. But rarely does a movie make me laugh so hard and so often…and that’s after watching it twice.
But Kevin Smith’s genius truly lies in his amazing ability to make you cry with both laughter and sorrow in the space of only a few minutes. This movie, despite the conversations on ass-to-mouth and Pillowpants the Pussy Troll, has an emotional core and a plot that, while predictable, really does speak volumes about friendship and living your life for yourself.
My main gripe is the acting, specifically the actor that plays the central character: Dante. But this is a man who has been in most of the Kevin Smith movies, and started in a VERY low budget independent production that has founded a rather impressive-sized cult. You can tell he has little experience as his lines are often over…somethinged. It has that fake quality to it, but he’s still the original, and I love that.
All in all it’s another hilarious romp through Kevin Smith’s Askewniverse, and I loved every minutes of it. Should this be the end of that realm, then it’s the perfect note to end on.
BOTTOM LINE: 9.0
This may be the funniest movie ever made. Period.
I know, I know. That’s a pretty bold statement. Notice I qualified it with the word “may,” to avoid at least a little bit of the certain backlash I’m sure to receive (or would if anybody actually read this thing). And I know there’s some stiff competition, Kevin Smith’s own Dogma qualifies as such. But rarely does a movie make me laugh so hard and so often…and that’s after watching it twice.
But Kevin Smith’s genius truly lies in his amazing ability to make you cry with both laughter and sorrow in the space of only a few minutes. This movie, despite the conversations on ass-to-mouth and Pillowpants the Pussy Troll, has an emotional core and a plot that, while predictable, really does speak volumes about friendship and living your life for yourself.
My main gripe is the acting, specifically the actor that plays the central character: Dante. But this is a man who has been in most of the Kevin Smith movies, and started in a VERY low budget independent production that has founded a rather impressive-sized cult. You can tell he has little experience as his lines are often over…somethinged. It has that fake quality to it, but he’s still the original, and I love that.
All in all it’s another hilarious romp through Kevin Smith’s Askewniverse, and I loved every minutes of it. Should this be the end of that realm, then it’s the perfect note to end on.
BOTTOM LINE: 9.0
I'm Back!!! (Well...Kinda)
Ok, so it's been forever since I've blogged on here. I just did a bit of back-reading, and decided that it's about time to jump back into it, despite the fact that I have three more weeks of mostly-crappy internet. But it's ok, I've decided to brave the one hour loading times at home and mooch on any high-speed I can get my hands on to bring you guys (both of you) that movie news I love to write about. I figure I'm gonna start out by doing some offline-writing and posting that on thoughts and reviews for movies I've gathered over the summer. Maybe get back to that classic movie reviewing I said I'd start but never did.
What better way to kick-off my return with Batman Begins 2 news (no, that's not the real title). As many of you may have heard, and sadly I was WAY behind the times on, the Joker has been cast. And the new Clown Prince of Crime is...Heath Ledger. I know, I know, that may have blindsided many of you as it did me. Where's the Paul Bettany or Lachy Hulme? But despite all that talk of those names, looking at Ledger I think it could work out. And I certainly don't doubt his acting.
Anyway, it's late as hell and I've screwed up my leg, so I'm gonna hit the hay. Tomorrow, the blogging begins anew. Later.
What better way to kick-off my return with Batman Begins 2 news (no, that's not the real title). As many of you may have heard, and sadly I was WAY behind the times on, the Joker has been cast. And the new Clown Prince of Crime is...Heath Ledger. I know, I know, that may have blindsided many of you as it did me. Where's the Paul Bettany or Lachy Hulme? But despite all that talk of those names, looking at Ledger I think it could work out. And I certainly don't doubt his acting.
Anyway, it's late as hell and I've screwed up my leg, so I'm gonna hit the hay. Tomorrow, the blogging begins anew. Later.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
REVIEW: X-men: The Last Stand
I know, I know, I havn't been posting much lately. This summer is going to be a bit of a hiatius cause of my job and lack of high-speed internet. I'll try and post now and again, but we'll see how it goes.
But right now, it's time for my newest review. X-Men: The Last Stand was a movie with perhaps the highest potential of any comic book movie made thus far. That is why this movie is perhaps the biggest disappointment of any comic book movie made thus far. And this is coming from someone who never read or knew about the Pheonix Saga prior to X2. From the pure awe and astonishment of my friends, unable to say anything other then a faintly whipered "Pheonix," upon seeing that shadow under the water, I knew X3 could be the most kick-ass film specticle ever witnessed by man. Ok, so the potential is a bit of an exaggeration, but my friend's reaction was not.
So you are going into a movie with the basis of one of the best comic storylines of all time AND you throw in the premise of a "cure" for mutants. Wow, that sounds awesome.
And it could've been. That's the thought that is going to haunt movie goers for years to come.
Instead what has been presented to us is a mediocre script and poor direction. The script at least provides room for some very moving and intense emotional scenes. But the setups are poor and the development worse. Characters are killed off or losing their powers, and not all of them are minor characters. There are characters we've come to love after the first two installments, and yet when their taken from us Ratner manages to not let us care. My girlfriend really liked the first two movies. If a major character (and often minor characters too) dies tragically and she doesn't so much as shed a tear, then it was handled very poorly.
That's not the say the movie a complete failure. When the action gets going, it really kicks ass. But action alone isn't enough to make up for poor storyline. So many characters are just tossed aside carelessly, and when the movie wraps you kinda look back on it all and think "where the hell did that come from."
Ratner was completely careless with the amazing gift that was given to him. He was handed an incredibly solid foundation to build upon. He had been given an excellent story and character the world already knew and loved. All he did was completely disconnect from his fan base and push the X-Men out of our hearts. I wanted to care, I really did.
Ratner, this movie would have been a lot better if it was the first outing. But you'd been handed a prepackaged success, and you threw it away.
BOTTOM LINE: 4/10
But right now, it's time for my newest review. X-Men: The Last Stand was a movie with perhaps the highest potential of any comic book movie made thus far. That is why this movie is perhaps the biggest disappointment of any comic book movie made thus far. And this is coming from someone who never read or knew about the Pheonix Saga prior to X2. From the pure awe and astonishment of my friends, unable to say anything other then a faintly whipered "Pheonix," upon seeing that shadow under the water, I knew X3 could be the most kick-ass film specticle ever witnessed by man. Ok, so the potential is a bit of an exaggeration, but my friend's reaction was not.
So you are going into a movie with the basis of one of the best comic storylines of all time AND you throw in the premise of a "cure" for mutants. Wow, that sounds awesome.
And it could've been. That's the thought that is going to haunt movie goers for years to come.
Instead what has been presented to us is a mediocre script and poor direction. The script at least provides room for some very moving and intense emotional scenes. But the setups are poor and the development worse. Characters are killed off or losing their powers, and not all of them are minor characters. There are characters we've come to love after the first two installments, and yet when their taken from us Ratner manages to not let us care. My girlfriend really liked the first two movies. If a major character (and often minor characters too) dies tragically and she doesn't so much as shed a tear, then it was handled very poorly.
That's not the say the movie a complete failure. When the action gets going, it really kicks ass. But action alone isn't enough to make up for poor storyline. So many characters are just tossed aside carelessly, and when the movie wraps you kinda look back on it all and think "where the hell did that come from."
Ratner was completely careless with the amazing gift that was given to him. He was handed an incredibly solid foundation to build upon. He had been given an excellent story and character the world already knew and loved. All he did was completely disconnect from his fan base and push the X-Men out of our hearts. I wanted to care, I really did.
Ratner, this movie would have been a lot better if it was the first outing. But you'd been handed a prepackaged success, and you threw it away.
BOTTOM LINE: 4/10
Saturday, May 13, 2006
MEG Concept Art
The novel MEG is a lot like how Michael Crichton would've written Jaws. A Megalodon, a lot like a shark only extinct now, is discovered by the scientest who was a laughing stock cause he suggested they may still exsist. Said monster proceeds to eat people, boats, whatever. It was an entertaining and quick read, and could be an entertaining monster movie if handled well. So far, so good. The concept art released thus far looks awesome. I'm hoping it will end up a cool summer movie reminding us of the good old days when Jaws ruled the water. However, cause Rush Hour 3 is costing so much to film, MEG is probably being pushed back 'til 2008.
Miami Vice Trailer
I'm getting a little bit excited about this movie. Miami Vice takes the cops from the old TV show and places them deep undercover in modern day, well, Miami. Looks like a pretty awesome flic from where I'm standing. The new trailer at Apple is linked to above, or check it out here.
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